I am attending a family wedding soon. This is no ordinary wedding, in fact, it is a veritable gala. š It is very easy to get caught up in the nerves of trying to fit in, trying to be whatever it is that I think is expected of me in order to be a presentable human at this event. I struggle with attempting to mold my personality, my core self into the mold that is presented to me.
What to wear? What to say or not say? Will my ankle hold out? All these questions stem from insecurity and from too much navel gazing. Too much thinking about myself.
We are all humans. We are all aging, thank goodness. Aging means we are still blessed enough to still be on this beautiful planet, and still able to praise our beautiful God and Savior Jesus Christ.
I am praying hard to not fall into my old traps of self-consciousness and people pleasing. I just want to be me, the me that blesses and encourages others, that is interested in their lives. I am praying that we will all enjoy each other’s differences and quirks and personalities. That we love all the ways that humans are created, that we stir each other on to more love for our God.
Most of all, I am praying for a lifetime of love and commitment and caring for the two lovebirds tying the knot. I am praying for all of us to surround them with love and excitement as they look forward to celebrating the best days of their lives. Every day. For as many years as God grants them on this earth, and in eternity to come.
Looking up and out, Lisa
Think About These Things 
I am copying what you are saying, but it is so right on about how people try to present themselves to others. “It is very easy to get caught up in the nerves of trying to fit in, trying to be whatever it is that I think is expected of me in order to be a presentable human at this event. I struggle with attempting to mold my personality, my core self into the mold that is presented to me.
You are so right. As you know I am OLD. The advantage of being old is that people will say, “He is just an old person just ignore what he says or does or looks like.” But we always want to present our best to other people just to fit in. I told everyone months ago on your blog, my friend list is very short and it is because I am who I am. I do not try to be someone that I am not. So I know people avoid me. It does not make me feel very good, but that is me.
I know you will be just fine at the event. The important thing is the hand of the Holy Spirit is on your shoulder. Your friend list is long and true. It is not how a person looks on the outside, it is how a person looks on the inside. That is the real you.
Doug Dwyer
P.S. I will pray that your ankle will allow you to stand and smile in your communications with guests.